Last Updated On: May 28th, 2026
Navigating the private school admissions process can feel overwhelming, but with the right approach and preparation, families can find the best fit for their children.
This interview with Sandy Eiges, a Los Angeles schools’ admissions expert, provides valuable insights into navigating the application process.
1. What is the single biggest mistake families make when applying to private middle or high schools — and how can they avoid it?
While it’s always important to stay positive when applying to schools, the single biggest mistake families make when applying to private middle and high schools is to assume that their elementary private school (or their friend, cousin or neighbor) will get them into the school of their choice. Admissions is a competitive process, and it is never a good idea to fixate on one school. And while the elementary school will certainly do its part, they won’t necessarily champion your student above all the others applying. Even if you have a straight A student, it is always a good idea to tour widely and apply to several schools.
2. How should a student’s application strategy differ between applying for middle school (6th/7th grade) versus high school (9th grade) entry points?
Sixth, seventh and ninth grade are all entry points into private schools. In general, 6th grade is the entry point for students coming from public school or K-8 schools, while seventh grade has more openings for students coming from K-6 private schools. 9th grade is always a more challenging entry point, even for siblings. Students coming from K-8 schools can apply for 6th or 7th and may not want to wait for 9th grade.
3. How much weight do private schools actually give to a student’s GPA and academic record versus their personality, extracurriculars, and interview performance?
Every school is different in terms of what they are looking for in a student, but they all want to see the kind of academic record that indicates they will be capable of accessing the curriculum at that school. If the student’s academic background is questionable, is there a solid teacher recommendation? Is there an explanation for that performance? Certainly, it’s not the only factor in school admissions, but it is still important to the school’s review of the student’s admissions file.
4. For students who are coming from a public-school background, how can they best position themselves against applicants from well-known private feeder schools?
Public school students should consider applying for 6th grade rather than 7th, so that they are not competing with the feeder schools. If holding out for a 7th grade entry at some of the top-tier schools, they should be able to position themselves as top-tier students, with excellent grades, stellar recommendations, consistent extra-curriculars, above-grade level writing and solid test scores.
5. What does a truly memorable student interview look like — and what are the most common ways students unintentionally hurt themselves in that setting?
The best student interview is a conversation in which the student is comfortable talking with an adult, can articulate their interests in a way that doesn’t seem memorized or rehearsed, and truly reflects their personality. Parents can get in the way by coaching students to say what the parents think is what the school wants to hear. That kind of interview can hurt the student. Students can also hurt themselves by being negative or dismissive about a school or a teacher or another student, and by bragging about themselves. And of course, language is always important, using their full range of vocabulary and not speaking to everyone as if they’re a fellow teenager.
6. How should families approach applying to a mix of reach, match, and safety schools without making a student feel like any school is a “backup”?
While speaking to students about the different schools, it is not helpful for parents to label the schools as reach, match or safety. They, and the students, should go into this process with an open mind and see which program truly resonates with the family and the student. Private schools use a holistic process in how they evaluate applicants, and families should do the same. Look at everything a particular school has to offer to help determine fit for a specific student, so that they ultimately apply to schools that are a fit. With that mindset, no school is a “backup.”
7. How significant is ISEE preparation in the overall admissions process?
I think that ISEE prep is critical, both for the student’s self-confidence and for achieving a respectable score. Families should consider doing a diagnostic ISEE in the spring, so there is plenty of time for the student to familiarize themselves with the exam, and prep for it if needed. This is an extraordinarily challenging exam that is not like any test the student has taken thus far, and most students will need a certain amount of test prep.
8. What role do recommendation letters play in the admissions decision, and what makes one stand out from the rest?
Recommendation letters are as important as every other piece of the application. It is ideal when the teacher really knows the student’s capabilities and can speak to those. While everyone will be submitting recommendations from a language arts and math teacher, it can be helpful if the student submits an additional recommendation from an extra-curricular teacher who has known and worked with the student over time.
9. At what point in a student’s middle school or high school journey should families start thinking seriously about the admissions process — and what should they be doing in the meantime?
It is helpful to start the admissions process in the spring, before private school application portals open. Often families will be able to get a tour of the school, attend an open house or various events at a school of interest, prior to applying. So for a 6th grade application, while you would apply when your child is in 5th grade, you would start the process in the spring of 4th grade; for a 7th grade application you would start the process in the spring of 5th grade; and for a 9th grade applicant you would start the process in the spring of 7th grade.
10. Beyond the application itself, what are the most effective ways for a family to demonstrate genuine interest in a school?
It is effective for families to demonstrate interest by touring, attending open houses, introducing themselves to the admissions team, and attending other events at the schools on your list. This will not only help the admissions team remember your students, but it will also help the student and the family get a better picture of the school community. Families should send thank you notes highlighting what they like about the school, that makes it a fit for the student. While not necessary, if you have a first-choice school you should let the school know that well before admissions decisions are made. You cannot say that to more than one school.
About Sandy: Sandy, M.S.W., is the founder of L.A. School Scout LLC™, the top city-wide admissions consulting company for preschool through high school. She is not only knowledgeable about private and parochial schools, K-12, including boarding schools, but she is also an expert in explaining and navigating the myriad of public-school options (including magnets and charters) as well. When people tell you to contact “a school scout” there is only one – L.A. School Scout™.
